Confession. Every third day, I think about going back to work. Seriously.
Each time, my reason is completely different. Some days it’s because I caught a glimpse of the person I once was. Take charge. Ambitious. Creative. Smart. I miss that girl. She was cool. I wonder what happened to her.
Other days, my intentions are less noble. Months and months ago, while potty training my son and cleaning up yet another puddle on the floor, it would occur to me, “If I were at work right now, this would be someone else’s problem. Not mine!”.
Most of the time, it happens because, simply put, I am worn down…from LIFE. And as we all know, a body that is worn down is more susceptible to catching things….
Things like myopia and “grass-is-greener”-itis.
Then, the phone rings or I remember that we’re supposed to be somewhere, and I get back in the game. My “ambivalence” is set aside for another day. I go on doing what has to get done, because that’s what moms do.
It takes a book like Just Let Me Lie Down to remind me that the grass is NOT greener. I remember that I left my job for some very valid reasons– two to be exact…
These feelings, while oftentimes overwhelming and isolating, are not unique to me. They’re unique to motherhood. As moms, we all face the same challenges, guilt, and sense of obligation. Financial issues aside, we all have choices to make. However, the supreme choice is whether or not to be happy.
So last week, when a opportunity presented itself, I jumped on it. A leap of faith, if you will. It’s a role that’s completely in line with what I used to do, but would still allow me to be home with my kids. So after tucking my kids into their beds, I held my breath and applied. A few days later, I was asked to submit a resume.
As part of my megalomania personal growth, I update my resume each year. Although with moving and baby and moving again, I’ve been a little behind on it this year… and last, but at least I knew where to find it on my computer.
When I attempted to open the Word doc, an error message popped up saying the “file is corrupt”. I tried several more times, but it was no use. It was clear that my resume, containing all of my accomplishments and achievements, could not be salvaged.
There’s an analogy in there that I would rather not dwell upon.
Disclosure: I received a copy of Just let Me Lie Down, Necessary Terms for the Half-Insane Working Mom by Kristin van Ogtrop to read and discuss as a contributor for the Silicon Valley Moms Blog. The thoughts and opinions expressed above are my own.
Kristin van Ogtrop is the editor of Real Simple magazine and writes a blog of her own called Adventures In Chaos. Her book is a fantastic read for any self-described half-insane mother. (That would be every mother, right?) You can purchase your own copy from any of these fine retailers.
To read other posts inspired this book, please click here.
Follow
I picked up a part-time job for awhile before I knew my 3rd child was on the way, because I thought the same thing. I wanted to get out, to talk with adults again. I thought getting away for awhile would make me a better parent. It didn’t, really. I was still tired when I got home. The noise they created was still loud.
I hope you were able to make another resume, maybe an even better one.
.-= C @ Kid Things´s last blog ..Attack of the Teeny Tiny Tarantulas =-.
Good luck. But let me tell you, don’t do it!!! I know it’s easy to say, but I’ve had a rough week at work. I can relate to a lot in that book.
.-= Heather´s last blog ..Tommy and Liam in Their New Stroller =-.
Yep, definitely universal. I’d have a hard time finding my resume too and I’m sure some sort of error would occur! HA! Good for you for jumping back in! 🙂
.-= Elaine´s last blog ..Imperfect =-.
This is a really good read for me, Must admit that you are one of the best bloggers I ever saw.Thanks for posting this informative article.if u need a good skin care just proceed to them.. i have taken care of my skin from them u can also have best skin care.