A Push for Presents

I had no clue “push presents” existed until I visited a friend and her new baby. Instead of offering me a chance to cuddle her new little bundle, she shoved a sparkly pair of diamond earrings in my face.

“For meeeee,” I joked.

“No, for ME,” she corrected. “Hubby gave them to me in the delivery room right after the baby was born. Aren’t they GORGOUS? Isn’t my husband UH-MA-ZING? Didn’t I marry the best and most thoughtful husband in the WHOLE WIDE WORLD?” [a dramatization based on real events]

The first question that came to mind was, “Isn’t the baby the gift… for both of you?” But I kept that to myself…

In spite of its many of names- “push presents”, “push prizes”, “baby baubles”, “slice of life” (for c-sections)- each more tacky than the last, giving a new mother a gift after enduing months of emotions and morning sickness, giving up her body, and hours of labor is actually a very lovely gesture. It just seems so quaint and old-fashioned, a remnant of the days when husbands were in the waiting room smoking a cigar instead of  in the delivery room holding your hand.

It’s as if presenting your partner with an object is the only way to be involved in the birth of a person. In modern times, men participate in every aspect of pregnancy and childbirth, short of actually having to endure it, of course. Couples baby showers, classes, blogs, and books geared to new dads, hours of crib/excersaucer/stroller assembly…  Maybe the men should get a gift too.

A Netflix subscription for the late nights spent rocking the baby back to sleep?  A top-of-the-line cappuccino maker to ward off sleep-deprivation? A manly diaper bag?

Apparently not. Every since my friend first flashed her new “twins”,  I have been fascinated with “push presents”. They’re becoming more popular these days, although they have been a long-standing tradition in other countries. In England, men give their partners a diamond ring. In India, new mothers are given gold jewelry.

Over the year, I’ve asked tons of friends about this new and strange custom. Jewelry seems to be the most popular, go-to item, particularly if it’s something that can eventually be passed down to the child. Just as often it’s designer diaper bags, an item of clothing, and expensive strollers being given. Along with push presents, I’ve also heard a lot more about “babymoons”, the final getaway before the sleepless nights begin.

As if it isn’t already obvious, I did not get  either of these things before or after the birth of either of my babies, but I never expected them either.

My husband admits to being a terrible gift giver. He has the best intentions, but his follow-through is somewhat… well, it blows. I think he’s too hard on himself because I couldn’t care less about that kind of stuff.

Being married to a man who got up with the children’s cries, hunted for loveys, washed and dried blankets and burp rags, stayed up to keep me company during the night feedings, and rocked the baby back to sleep after is all the “push present” I need.

Isn’t my husband UH-MA-ZING? Didn’t I marry the best and most thoughtful husband in the WHOLE WIDE WORLD?

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This post was written for “All About the Bump Month”, where eight other bloggers and I will be discussing all things mommy and baby. We have some terrific sponsors, fantastic prizes, and an amazing giveaway valued at $1,000!

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